a poem about waking up.

open my eyes.

(the world is reborn)

open them wide.

(system reboot)

open my eyes.

(a new day has arrived) 

open my eyes

(it’s blurry at first)

open my eyes

(kind of uncomfortable. kind of hurts) 

open them wide

new eyes. new eyes. new day. new life

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how I long (to be free)

there are so many parts of myself that I hide from everyone else. I don’t know if i’ll ever be able to be free in my on skin; my own body. my mind tends to hide doesn’t like to share. is scared. so scared. takes other peoples values to high puts itself down too low. tends to mould… into whatever, whatever people think will be best. whatever I think will be best? why don’t I want to be known for alllll that I am, why is there always parts that can’t be shown and will they ever be ready, will I ever be ready? am I ever really myself? or just parts of someone else that I put together the way I see it best. I’m scared that I will never know me. and that is why no one else ever will either. and i’m not sure what to do with  that. I spend so much time alone just getting to know ME how sad is that… it seems so silly. but it’s all true so what is there now left to do? to help make myself something see-through something people can see… something I can see. i’m tired of hiding and i’m tired of feeling like i’m lying. I just want to be myself I just want to feel free

I just want to be me. (be free)