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i’m gonna mourn you tonight

gonna soak up every memory till it eats me alive

cause it just doesn’t feel right – to be apart tonight, or for the rest of my life

it doesn’t feel right.

 

so i’ll pretend you’re here with me – i’ll binge on a feast of our memories 

it’ll taste so bitter & so damn sweet 

forpoem

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connections

There are strings between you and some people that are stronger than others – you can even feel it when they start to miss you – feel the string tugging on your soul 

when you k(no)w

So it was always her. And I was always right. Right in the worst way.  Guess I was always a rebound or a stepping stone to lead you back home. And your home is her and my home is empty searching for peace within the mess of all this. the mess of the lies and the things we tell ourselves so we can sleep at night. And I still dream of you and play future movies in my head. What a fucking delusion thinking we were meant to be what a fictional story what ironic hypocrisy. Guess love really does make you blind. Guess it’s time to leave you behind.

unsent/unread love letters

I know there is nothing that I could say but I thought you should know how much of a shame it is that we ended up this way. and I still don’t like what I had become, or the way I treated you- the one that I loved. And it was so sad to ruin us. And I cant take it back or spend my time wishing it so. But I hope to god that you can forgive, or that you already did. Or that I can move past this and stop wishing away, and wasting my days, and soaking you up with all the thoughts in my brain.

And there is really nothing I can say,  just want you to know I didn’t want to leave you that way, and I wanted you to stay, and I didn’t mean to hurt you that way. And I never believed you, and i’m sorry for that. That’s my issue and you have yours, and I don’t know if we could’ve worked them out but I know sure as hell that I could have tried more. But I hope your okay and I love you all the same, any other way.