Delusional

While I was doing tarot readings to see where we stood, Asking you why you never texted me goodnight? Asking if you we’re really too busy where you were

It was always “work”. But it was always her.

Don’t go to the next when you’re still on your ex,

you said, “She’s in a box”, i don’t even think about her,

I said “are you sure?”

I said “are you sure?”

And then maybe 100x more I said, “are you sure?”

 

Cause I was sure you weren’t,

And you weren’t.

 

A year and a half,

That’s how long it took for you to have the courage, no the decency, no the respect to tell me the truth

A year and a half, that’s how long it took for you to be honest with yourself that the box you spoke so fondly of, was always see-through,

And you were always looking in,

Matter of fact, the lid was wide open,

Memories constantly spilling out and you let them, you flooded your brain with them

 

I know cause I did the same for you, with you, all the time

I was with you. But you were never mine,

 

I said to my friend “Something just doesn’t feel right, I feel it in my gut,

I feel closed in; like i can’t breathe, like i’m trapped”

————————————————————————————————————————

“She’s in a box”, trust me

Turns out that ‘she’ was me

Only mine was closed tight with no visiting thoughts or wandering eyes, no see through windows, no effort to open, no will to unfold

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